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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24873271">Shifting the Balance</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/RenjiFan/pseuds/RenjiFan'>RenjiFan</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drunk Shenanigans, First Time, M/M, Sexual Tension, Sexy Times</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:02:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,169</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24873271</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/RenjiFan/pseuds/RenjiFan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After witnessing something at their local bar, Jared says something that will forever shift the balance of the relationship he has with his best friend and co-star.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>125</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Shifting the Balance</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Originally posted to LJ April, 2009.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Dude, you, uh, you gotta little sumthin’…” Jensen is already reaching across the table, plucking at whatever is stuck to Jared’s cheek and Jared grins at him. Jensen’s anal tendencies about appearance shatter whatever modesty he has anymore when it comes to “cleaning” Jared in public. It’s amusing.</p>
<p>Jensen doesn’t realize he does it, of course, until he’s either half-way into doing it or already done, so when he pulls back and looks quizzically at his smirking friend, then down to his hand with a blush and a mumble, Jared laughs full-out, happy and content with his neurotic best friend as his entertainment.</p>
<p>“You’re such a spaz,” Jensen grumbles, picking up his beer and Jared lets out another huff.</p>
<p>“I’m the spaz? You’re the one cleanin’ me like a mother hen or sumthin’,” Jared chuckles, staring down at the two tequila shots warming in front of them. He thinks of the five previous shots and groans. “Dude, why are we doin’ another shot? I’m already drunk and I kinda like my liver.”</p>
<p>Jensen smirks at him around the rim of the bottle, eyes lit with mischief. “Cause it’s the weekend,” he says as he pulls the bottle away, licking his lower lip to collect the moisture there. “And you’re from Texas, and tequila is awesome. And….” Jensen’s reasoning trails off, his gaze distracted by something over Jared’s shoulder, expression turning dark in seconds as he watches whatever it is play out.</p>
<p>“What?” Jared asks uselessly before turning around. And he sees it, too. Can’t help but see the couple in the darkened corner; a tall dark-haired guy pressed hard against the wall, a shorter blonde settled between his splayed legs. Jared can see the flex of muscle, the pull of fabric around the blonde guy’s shoulders and back as he presses forward, rutting against the other, the dark-haired guy’s mouth falling open to let out what Jared imagines is a moan lost among the noise of the bar.</p>
<p>From where they’re sitting, Jared thinks they have the perfect view of the pair, the bar and the door beside them effectively cutting them off from sight of anyone else, but Jared and Jensen… They can see everything.</p>
<p>Blonde guy shushes whatever noise his partner’s making with his mouth, hips continuing their tortuous rhythm up, down, back, forward and Jared swallows thickly, turns back to see Jensen still staring.</p>
<p>He clears his throat, picks up the shot and tosses it back effortlessly. The sound of the glass slamming on the table breaks Jensen’s spell and his eyes land on Jared, still slightly dazed.</p>
<p>Jensen shakes his head, mouth curling on one side as he picks up his shot and throws it back, sighing at the burn before laughing lowly. “You’d think they’d pick a better spot than the bar,” he says nonchalantly, but Jared picks up on the change in his voice, the slightly anxious and tense way his throat wraps around the words and he feels something stir in the pit of his stomach.</p>
<p>He lowers his eyes to his bottle, picks at the label as he nods. “Yeah, you’d think.”</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>An hour later, Jared stares mindlessly out of the cab window, watching the city as it slides by in a haze of color and lights. He’s warm and tingly, the tenth and final shot finally making it to his head and his limbs are heavy and lazy.</p>
<p>His thoughts drift, but occasionally, they revert back to the scene at the bar, the way those two guys seemed so lost in each other, oblivious to anyone else. He thinks about how Jensen looked while watching them, the subtle shift in his eyes, the slight part of his lips, the bob of his throat as he swallowed.</p>
<p>“Jay?” Jensen’s voice rings from beside him and he forces his gaze away from the hypnotic lights, turns to look at his best friend.</p>
<p>“Hmm?” he asks, head lolling until he finds the back of the seat. He blinks slowly at Jensen and Jensen smiles softly at him.</p>
<p>“Dude, you’re wasted,” he says and Jared just hums as he closes his eyes. He twitches slightly when he feels the warmth of Jensen’s fingers brushing across his brow, pulling his hair from his face before tucking it lightly behind his ear. He smiles at the motion, warmth pooling low in his belly, so different but just as intoxicating as the alcohol.</p>
<p>“Hey, Jen?” he asks, not bothering to open his eyes as he feels Jensen’s hand fall to rest on his shoulder. Heat radiates from Jensen’s skin, warming the side of Jared’s face as he slides closer, nuzzles against the fabric of Jensen’s jacket. “You ever think about it?”</p>
<p>“Think about what, Jay?” Jensen’s voice sounds amused, light.</p>
<p>“Ya know, what all the fans talk about. Me ‘n you. Bein’ a couple ‘n shit,” Jared’s voice travels the path of his thoughts, words drawn out in the laze of his intoxication.</p>
<p>Jensen is silent for a long minute and Jared opens his eyes, finds his best friend staring at him with a bewildered look on his face before he detects the slightest twitch of Jensen’s hand, like he wants to move his hand but can’t, or won’t.</p>
<p>“You do, don’t you?” Jared asks, alcohol making him confident in his assessment and Jensen blinks at him before pulling his hand away, settling back on the seat.</p>
<p>“You’re really drunk,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest.</p>
<p>“Doesn’t make me wrong,” Jared says quietly, closing his eyes again. “It’s okay. I do, too.” He sighs deep and gives into the temptation of rest, letting the lull of the cab ride pull him into slumber.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Jensen wakes him when they arrive home and it takes every ounce of determination Jared is capable of to walk up the few steps to his door and the handful it takes to land face-first on the couch. He’s already starting to doze when he feels Jensen’s hand wrap around his arm, tugging him and he whines. “Dun wanna. Stairs,” he complains, burying his face in the cushions as he hears Jensen chuckle above him.</p>
<p>“There’s no way you’re from Texas if ten shots puts you under like this,” Jensen says, hauling him to his feet and Jared slumps against him, head resting against his shoulder.</p>
<p>“Went ta work at four, ‘member? You got to sleep in…” Jared’s eyes are closed, but his feet move with the guidance Jensen gives him, leading him away from the couch.</p>
<p>Jensen’s arm is wrapped firmly around his waist, warm and comfortable and steady. Jared opens his eyes as he realizes they’ve stopped, their journey much shorter than he anticipated.</p>
<p>He looks at Jensen, confused when he sees they’re in Jen’s room, lights turned off and sheets turned down. Jensen unwraps himself from Jared and pushes him lightly until he sits on the bed. “No stairs,” he says with a small smile and Jared can’t help but return it before falling onto the softness of Jensen’s pillows.</p>
<p>His drunk mind sees nothing wrong with this. His drunk mind doesn’t question that he’s currently in his best friend’s bed, at his best friend’s insistence. Doesn’t question the urge to roll and curl up against the warmth of Jensen’s naked back, so he does.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>“Ohmygod, I’m gonna die,” Jared groans as he opens his eyes and is blinded by the morning sun. His head pounds at the intense light and he rolls over, elbow knocking something soft and warm. He cracks an eye open and sees that the victim of his attack is, in fact, his best friend, currently zonked out beside him with a hand tucked under his pillow.</p>
<p>Jared’s heart speeds up as he realizes where he is, remembers bits and pieces of how he got here and he suppresses his urge to groan, in mortification this time.</p>
<p>Jared isn’t one of those people who’re lucky enough to black out when they’re drunk. There’s always something, some recollection of the previous night’s events, some faint whispers of whatever happened and sometimes Jared hates it.</p>
<p>This is one of those times. Because he explicitly remembers his conversation with Jensen in the cab, remembers asking him if he ever thought about them as something more than friends, remembers admitting that he does.</p>
<p>And that makes the fact that he’s here in Jensen’s bed that much more confusing, because while he’d been sure that Jensen did think about them that way last night, he never actually confirmed his suspicions, and yet here Jared is, warm and sleepy in Jensen’s bed.</p>
<p>Jensen makes a soft noise, shifting slightly before settling again and Jared lets his arm fall from over his eyes, opens them to watch his friend sleep.</p>
<p>Jensen is beautiful. It’s an undisputed fact. The man cannot be ugly, no matter how hard he tries, no matter how hard he wants to be seen for something other than his attractiveness, it’s simply a cold, brutal fact. He’s beautiful. And Jared appreciates that fact every day, watches Jensen when he’s unaware, catalogs the texture of his skin and freckles, the way his clothes bunch and stretch when he moves, the way his eyes project whatever emotion he wants.</p>
<p>Jared’s always been fascinated with Jensen, but not just because of how he looks. It’s because of how he treats him, like Jared’s the best friend he’s ever had, a prize worth being treasured, a person he intends to keep in his life come hell or high water. It’s almost brotherly, but… not.</p>
<p>The soft touches, the looks that last a beat too long, the way Jensen’s eyes fall to Jared’s lips when he speaks. It’s hard to ignore those facts, but up until he’d seen the way Jensen watched the couple at the bar, seen him tense under a line of obvious interest and arousal, he never thought Jensen would be interested in pursuing whatever it was he may or may not have felt for Jared.</p>
<p>He wonders what it would be like if he kissed Jensen, right now, while he slept. Would Jensen’s mouth be soft like it looks? Would it taste of settled tequila and buffalo wings? Would Jensen wake up and kiss him back? Or push him away and tell him to leave?</p>
<p>Jared’s so lost in wondering these things, eyes focused on the curve of Jensen’s mouth that he doesn’t notice when Jensen opens his eyes. He startles when he feels the tentative touch of Jensen’s hand on his hip and his gaze flies up to find Jensen staring at him with glazed eyes, a sleepy smile forming on his lips.</p>
<p>“You feelin’ okay?” Jensen asks and his voice his sleep-rough, deep and Jared fights the shiver that threatens him as he feels Jensen’s thumb move slowly across the expanse of hipbone peeking from the top of his jeans.</p>
<p>He swallows visibly and nods. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good,” he says, hopes like hell this is what he thinks it is and then Jensen’s smiling wider, eyes brighter as they crinkle on the corners.</p>
<p>“You. Were. Wasted,” he says pointedly and suddenly, the hand’s gone and Jared’s left reeling as Jensen sits up, swings his legs over the side of the bed. “I need coffee,” he says, pulling his arms into a stretch over his head. He turns and looks at Jared over his shoulder. “You gonna shower before breakfast?”</p>
<p>Jared just stares, blinks several times before nodding again, unsure if he can trust his voice.</p>
<p>Jensen returns it and stands, footsteps heavy as he makes his way out of the room and leaving Jared alone in a too-warm and rumpled bed.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Jared’s showers are usually quick, five minutes or so and this is mostly because he takes two a day and doesn’t have time to indulge during the week when they’re filming from sun-up to sun-down or more. Today, though, he sits under the spray of the too-hot water until his skin wrinkles, feels his face flush with the heat of the shower and steam, his mind a cloud of confusion and awe and wavering self-degradation for allowing himself to even hope things are changing the way he’s wanted them to for quite a while.</p>
<p>He can’t remember a specific point in time when he decided he wanted to be with Jensen; actually be with him, but the feeling has grown ever-steady the last few months, having Jensen here with him at the house. Everything has always felt so natural with Jen, conversations never forced, no egos in the way of actually speaking their minds and respecting each other’s opinions. They’re equals in their differences as well as their similarities and it makes what they share that much more special.</p>
<p>Jared stares at his reflection in the steamed-over bathroom mirror, wonders if he somehow managed to shift the balance last night with his drunken confession, wonders if he’d be wrong to get his hopes up.</p>
<p>When he emerges from the bathroom, the scent of bacon wafts in the air like a beacon and Jared makes his way downstairs and into the kitchen to find Jensen cooking at the stove, both dogs sitting obediently and patiently on either side of him. He’s dressed in a pair of worn jeans, thread picked bare on the knees. An old faded black Motley Crue t-shirt clings to him like a second skin as he carelessly flips the bacon with one hand, the other bringing a cup of coffee to his mouth.</p>
<p>The dogs notice Jared first and he smiles as they perk and run to him, tails wagging and ears stuck straight in the air. He bends down to rub them, murmuring his hellos to his babies as he hears Jensen’s voice. “Hey, you wanna grab the toast?”</p>
<p>Jared looks up and sees Jensen looking over his shoulder at him, a slight smile on his face, eyes bright with at least three cups of coffee. His hair is still matted to his head from sleep, glasses hanging precariously from his nose, steam fading from the bottom edges from the heat of the stove.</p>
<p>Jared gives Harley one last pat before folding one of Sadie’s ears back lovingly and stands, moves to the sink to wash his hands. The toaster is placed just a few feet from the stove on the counter and Jared swipes the loaf of bread from the box before plopping in four slices and setting it to medium. He turns and props his hip on the counter as he folds his arms over his chest and takes a deep breath before speaking. “Jen, I-”</p>
<p>“Oh, hey, before I forget!” Jensen interrupts, eyes still focused on the skillet in front of him. “Sorry, but uh…” he turns and faces Jared, cheeks stained a light pink. “I kinda forgot to tell you that Chris is comin’ into town today… I told him he could crash here for the night. I mean, just tell me if it’s not cool or whatever, but he’s only in town til tomorrow afternoon and I figured we could go out, get some drinks or whatever,” he rambles and Jared quirks a brow at him. Jensen never rambles. He’s always so damned composed and self-aware and the whole thing has Jared so surprised that all he can do it blink at him for a few seconds before nodding.</p>
<p>“Yeah. Yeah, man. It’s cool,” he tells him, and he can’t help but think there’s no way he’s imagining the change in Jensen’s behavior. There’s no way he’s just seeing what he wants to see because Jensen is obviously flustered as he trains his eyes on the food like it’s the secret of life. He’s so caught up by this thought that he completely forgets that he had started to apologize for the night before. Instead, he just watches the way the overhead light from the stove casts an ethereal glow on the bridge of Jensen’s nose until the toaster pops beside him and Jensen announces the meat done.</p>
<p>They eat in relative silence, which isn’t rare because food-time is usually the only peaceful time they get while working on set. When they finish, Jared starts cleaning up and isn’t even done loading the dishwasher when Jensen calls out that he’s heading out to the airport, will pick up some beer on the way home.</p>
<p>Jared yells the affirmative and the soft click of the front door locking leaves Jared alone to his thoughts once more.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Christian Kane was not Jared’s favorite person when they met, both of them having an unexplained animosity toward the other for almost a year until they realized they were both just looking out for Jensen. A mutual understanding was met then, that both of them would kill anyone who dared fuck with Jensen, and Jared found himself actually coming to like the guy after a while. He was laid-back and had known Jensen for a long time, shared memories of a time Jared knew nothing about and he liked to hear the stories of the wild parties and embarrassing stunts they pulled when they went out with Steve back in the day.</p>
<p>They’d spent the day bull-shittin’ around the house, catching up and playing with the dogs in the backyard as they grilled out and Chris let them listen to the latest mastered version of his EP. Electing for a night in, by nightfall they’d hunkered down in the living room, watching a cable-edited version of Bad Boys while Chris rolled a blunt with practiced ease.</p>
<p>“I’m tellin’ ya, Jen. The girls out in Philly are fucking crazy,” Chris tells them before swiping his tongue over the brown cigar paper. He licks his lips and folds the paper under and over, tucking it firmly before smoothing it down with his lips.</p>
<p>“I don’t doubt it,” Jensen muses, lazy and sprawled on the edge of the couch. Jared watches Jensen watch Chris as he lights the blunt, tokes it until the cherry burns red and hot.</p>
<p>Jared’s never been much of a smoker, of any kind, but he finds it nice, to sit in the comfort of his home with his best friend and his oldest friend, getting relaxed and worrying about nothing. It’s something he never would’ve imagined back in the Gilmore days, when he was so socially conscious, afraid of any and all wrong moves, too preoccupied with creating an image than actually having a life.</p>
<p>He realizes that his life never really started until Supernatural, until Jensen. His eyes flicker to the meeting of hands as Chris passes the blunt to Jensen from his seat on the recliner and follows the burning ember as it comes to Jensen’s mouth.</p>
<p>Jensen’s eyes are closed as he pulls hard on the end, chest expanding as he holds in the smoke and Jared’s eyes are focused on the shape of Jensen’s mouth, pursed and rounded, slick and pink until Jensen lets his hand fall away to rest on his thigh.</p>
<p>Jared feels a flush of heat make its way from the back of his neck to the tips of his ears as he realizes Jensen’s eyes are open, half-lidded and staring at him, watching him as he watches Jensen and there’s a look in Jensen’s eyes Jared can’t decipher.</p>
<p>He startles when he hears Chris get up, announcing he’s grabbing another round and he watches as Jensen lets a trail of smoke out through his parted lips.</p>
<p>“Hey, Jay,” he says and his voice is low, husky and full of grit and Jared feels his legs twitch at the sound. He doesn’t say anything, just meets Jensen’s eyes again as he takes another long drag from the blunt and his eyes widen slightly as Jensen sits up, pressing forward until he has to brace himself with a hand on Jared’s chest to keep his balance.</p>
<p>Jensen’s lips are just as warm and inviting as he always thought they’d be as they press against his own, smoke filtering from his parted lips and into Jared’s mouth and he closes his eyes, sucks it down as he memorizes the smell of Jensen pressed so close against him. Jensen pulls away but Jared stays still, holds the smoke as long as he can before letting it go in a long sigh, eyes opening slowly to find Jensen back in his place, legs sprawled carelessly, eyes lidded and watching.</p>
<p>“Thanks,” he breathes, unable to fight the twitch of a smile on his lips when he sees the beginnings of Jensen’s smirk as Chris reemerges with three fresh beers and a bag of Cheetos.</p>
<p>They pass the blunt until it burns their fingertips, crush it out in a bottle cap and Jared can’t remember the last time he’s felt so elated, so at ease. It isn’t until much later, as they watch some crappy action flick on Pay-Per-View that Jared realizes that somehow, throughout the course of the night, he and Jensen have moved closer, close enough that their thighs are pressed solidly against the other and Jensen’s hand is warm where it’s settled over his hip, fingers tracing the hem of his jeans mindlessly as his eyes try and focus on the movie.</p>
<p>Jared knows then that something has definitely shifted, changed. Something that could possibly be the most amazing thing that’s ever happened to him and when Jensen looks over at him, smiles lazily as his thumb presses on the junction of hip and thigh, he knows that Jensen knows it, too.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Chris leaves the following afternoon after thanking them for a good time by taking them out to breakfast and buying them the largest bottle of Jack Daniel’s Jared has ever seen in his life. He has a feeling something was said between his best friend and their visitor by the way Chris looks at him thoughtfully throughout breakfast, eyes narrowed but not in an incriminating way; more speculation.</p>
<p>Jensen drops Jared back off at the house before taking Chris to the meeting he came to town for and by the time he returns, it’s almost dark and the temperature has dropped about twenty-five degrees, allowing for a light snowfall that isn’t uncommon this time of year in Vancouver.</p>
<p>Jared lights up the fireplace and watches in amusement as Harley and Sadie huddle together, heads on each other’s backs, bodies laid out to absorb the heat radiating from the hearth. He orders from their favorite Indian place before finally resting down on the couch, listening to the gentle hum and splatter of water from down the hall as Jensen takes a shower before dinner.</p>
<p>He knows they should talk about this, but he wonders if it could possibly screw up whatever it is they have going. Something has changed, and he’s been pretty much proven correct in his theory that Jensen has thought about them in a more than platonic way, but that doesn’t mean he feels the same as Jared, wants the same things, wants the commitment and all that it entails. Jared’s had years to contemplate what he wants with Jensen, ever since the first twinge of attraction dawned on him, ever since he decided he would rather spend his life as a bachelor and Jensen’s friend and roommate than Sandy’s husband.</p>
<p>He’s scared to talk, if he’s completely honest with himself, because if Jensen doesn’t want the same things… It wouldn’t kill him but it would be a hurt he doesn’t want to voluntarily walk into. Now, though, with the distinct possibility of it hovering just a few doors down, he can’t help but wonder if everything they’ve been through together has been leading to this.</p>
<p>He’s in the kitchen, pulling out cartons of food and separating them on the counter when Jensen steps into the room, droplets of water falling from his short-cropped hair onto his grey henley and Jared’s hands go still, eyes fixed on a bead as it trails down the side of Jensen’s neck.</p>
<p>Heat coils inside him like a flash of lighting, body shivering visibly at the sudden and intense reaction and his eyes flicker up to Jensen’s, wide and open and he knows Jensen can see what he’s been so good at hiding up until now. He’s surprised by the slow darkening of Jensen’s eyes, the way his pupils grow wide as he stares back and Jared tries to speak, voice caught in the sudden dryness of his throat.</p>
<p>Jared can almost see the tension pouring between them in that moment, Jensen standing stock still, Jared unable to look away from the eyes staring him down as if they’re seeing him for the first time. And then, it’s like someone yelled “Action!” on set, because they’re both moving, toward and together until they collide in the middle of the kitchen, mouths hungry and desperate as hands grab hold tight.</p>
<p>Jensen kisses like he acts, complete and total dedication and concentration, his lips moving languidly even as his tongue fucks the inside of Jared’s mouth, around his tongue, slick slide of muscle to taste and collect and Jared moans at the innate feeling of Finally that courses through the hot blood in his veins.</p>
<p>It’s nothing and everything like he imagined it would be, Jensen devouring him like he’s savoring every touch, taste, hands trembling as they skirt over Jared’s sides, down to grip at his hips and pull and Jared moans into the nonexistent space between them, bites down on Jensen’s bottom lip in a plea for more. His hands roam the angular planes of Jensen’s face, thumbs tracing over the sharp cheekbones, and down, resting over the thrumming pulse on his neck and he’s pushing, guiding them back until Jensen lets out a gasp as he collides with the wall.</p>
<p>Jared’s skin feels too tight as he fits a knee between Jensen’s, rubs his thigh against the hardened flesh he feels burning through Jensen’s pajama pants and his own cock twitches as Jensen whimpers into his mouth, fingers clenching tight.</p>
<p>“Jay…” Jensen keens, breath hot as he pants against Jared’s mouth and they’re staring at each other now, so close as Jensen rubs against him, eyes threatening to roll back as Jared moves, shifts to align their dicks and ruts forward against his best friend as he attacks his mouth once more.</p>
<p>It’s the opening of a flood gate and they’re powerless against the force that they’re under, helpless to the lust that rolls through them, finally released after god knows how long being repressed under feelings of doubt and doing the right thing. But Jared can’t care about any of those things now, not when he knows Jensen wants, needs this as bad as he does, can feel the hunger with every taste of his mouth, every silent plea for more as Jensen matches pace against him, cock solid and hot.</p>
<p>Jared pulls away from Jensen’s mouth just long enough to find the stubbled line of Jensen’s jaw, mouth pressing wetly against the flushed skin. “What do you want, Jen?” he pants out as his hips work continuously, never letting up because it feels too good, too perfect, here with Jensen, needy and broken sounds escaping his throat as Jared works a hand between them to mold over the bulge between his legs.</p>
<p>“I… ah, God…. Jay…” Jensen’s eyes are closed when Jared pulls back enough to watch him, hand working slowly as he palms over the hot, moist length of his cock. Jared can’t catch his breath, heart beating too fast, too erratically in his chest as he watches Jensen’s eyes crack open, blown dark with lust and need, lips parting as he whispers, “Bedroom.”</p>
<p>Jensen presses against him as he pushes from the wall, mouth latching on to Jared’s fiercely as he takes control, hands and feet leading Jared backward until they’re stumbling blindly down the hallway, and Jared doesn’t think anything could ever taste as good as the way Jensen’s mouth does, doesn’t think anything could feel as good as the way Jensen’s hands hold him like he can’t bear the thought of letting go even long enough to get them to the room and the thought of it makes him groan, hands molding to Jensen’s skull, soft hairs prickling against his palms.</p>
<p>They stop once they’re inside, Jared’s knees backed up to the edge of the bed and Jensen pulls away, breath coming hard and deep as he lets go of Jared’s hips, hands swift as he reaches down to pull his shirt over his head and Jared can’t do anything but watch, heart beating hard against the inside of his chest, head dizzy from lack of air and want.</p>
<p>“Jen…” he breathes out as he watches Jensen drop the shirt to the floor, hand reaching up instinctively to touch the smooth skin of Jensen’s chest, skin hot and pink and Jensen sucks in a breath as Jared places his palm directly over Jensen’s heart, feels the heavy drum of its beat.</p>
<p>Jensen reaches forward, hands gripping tight on the hem of Jared’s shirt before he tugs roughly, forcing Jared to relent his touch in order to free himself of the restricting material and he hisses as the chilled air touches his over-warm skin. But then there’s heat again as Jensen presses forward against him and Jared lets himself fall back onto the bed. Jensen crawls up his body, mouth pressing against his throat to lick the skin, nip with sharp, perfect teeth and Jared tenses at the onslaught, can’t remember ever feeling this turned on and still being half-clothed, but this is Jensen and everything has always been better with Jensen.</p>
<p>His fingers struggle for purchase in the sheets as Jensen settles between his legs, delicious accidental friction making them both cry out in surprise and pleasure. Jensen bites down on the plump flesh of Jared’s lip as his hand slips through Jared’s hair, pushing it away from his face with care before he cradles Jared’s jaw with his palm.</p>
<p>Jared swallows, pants out hot breaths as Jensen pulls away, eyes half-lidded and like jade fire as they stare down at him, hunger seeping out of every pore as his fingers work to push through Jared’s hair, soothing and calm in contrast. Jared can see the questions, the whys and the how long and the most important why didn’t you tell me riding just behind the lust in his best friend’s features but he knows now isn’t the time for words, can see the absolute need that takes precedence as Jensen’s eyes fall to his lips.</p>
<p>“Jen…” Jared’s voice is a rough whisper as he pushes forward, catching onto that beautiful mouth once more as his hands slide between them to rest questioningly on the hem of Jensen’s pants. Jensen hums his approval, shifting to help him get rid of the material separating them before kicking it away and then Jensen’s hands are on Jared’s belt, fingers working quickly, pulling away leather and then sliding the button from its slot, zipper scratching coarsely over Jared’s boxers as he eases it down.</p>
<p>“Jay… off,” he murmurs and Jared wraps an arm around Jensen, flips them until he’s on top and Jensen’s hands are coasting along his skin, mapping every inch of revealed flesh as he kicks away his the final pieces of clothing separating him from what he wants most.</p>
<p>He hears rather than sees Jensen rooting around in the nightstand, distracted by trying to get himself free of his pants but when he looks up, sees Jensen staring back at him with dark, hungry eyes, he can’t decide whether he wants to come right then and there or wait until one of them is buried inside the other. Cause at this point, he really doesn’t give a shit who or what as long as it just fucking happens.</p>
<p>And it seems Jensen’s on board with that feeling when he spreads his legs, bottle forgotten beside them as he pulls Jared up by his face to seal their mouths together in a kiss so desperate, Jared thinks he may have just lost the ability to focus on anything that isn’t Jensen ever again.</p>
<p>Their bodies slot together and it isn’t weird how perfect they fit, isn’t strange that instead of a lovely curve and mound he feels the rock solid heat of Jensen’s cock as they move together. His body is trembling with the need to come and as the pool of their shared pre-cum slides between them, he can tell that Jensen is just as close.</p>
<p>He pulls away then, decision made and he stares down at Jensen with a shuddering breath, willing away the impending coil of heat in his gut. “What do you want, Jen?” he asks again and Jensen’s half-lidded eyes flicker down to the space between them, legs spreading farther as he settles deeper into the bed.</p>
<p>“Wanna ride you,” he finally says, eyes slowly gazing upward, catching Jared’s and it slams into Jared’s gut like a semi, breath catching somewhere near his heart as it slams against his chest.</p>
<p>All he can manage is a nod before Jensen is sitting up, pushing Jared over and onto his back as he maneuvers them until he’s straddling Jared’s thighs. Jared watches as Jensen reaches for the bottle of lube, tearing the safety wrap away with his teeth, eyes locked on Jared’s the entire time and Jared can barely breathe, can’t believe this is happening.</p>
<p>Jensen pops the lid and takes Jared’s hand, spills a healthy amount of the cool gel on his fingers before rubbing it around, between, down the length until it’s dripping into Jared’s palm. He lets go and Jared pulls his hand away, reaching between them as Jensen moves forward, forehead resting on Jared’s shoulder as he trails his fingers down the end of Jensen’s spine to the dip of his crease.</p>
<p>“Jesus, Jen,” he breathes and Jensen shivers as he lets his hand push down the crevice, tip of his index finger barely brushing the puckered opening Jensen is so readily exposing for him and it makes him ache, how much Jensen is trusting him, how much he’s giving. “Want you,” he tells him, head turning to kiss at Jensen’s neck, wet and sloppy, lips sucking at the skin as he pushes past the resistance with his finger. Jensen stiffens only slightly before he groans, pushes back until Jared’s finger is buried completely inside him.</p>
<p>Jensen lifts, braces himself over Jared with an elbow on each side. “Come on,” he urges, face desperate as he rocks back. “I’m not gonna break, dude, come on.” And Jared takes the hint, pulls back and pushes forward again with two, staring raptly at the tortured expression on Jensen’s face as he moans, hips twitching against and then toward his hand. “Yeah, come on.”</p>
<p>“Jen…” is all he gets out before Jensen’s lips finds his, tongue fucking into his mouth as he fucks himself on Jared’s hand, body quivering with the strain of holding himself up and Jared uses his free hand to brace him at the waist, guides him forward, back, fingers curling inside him until Jensen lets out a choked off whimper.</p>
<p>“More,” he pleads, pulling away from the kiss, forehead resting on Jared’s chin and Jared pushes a third finger in with the rest, feels his whole body tense at the feel of Jensen opening up for him.</p>
<p>Jensen gets ahold of the bottle somehow because suddenly he’s got a hand between them, fist spreading more than enough of the cool substance on Jared’s dick, up, down in time with his hips and Jared bites the inside of his cheek, tastes the blood as he resists the urge to come.</p>
<p>“Fuck,” he whines, eyes clenched tight as Jensen’s cruel hand moves so fucking slow around him. He feels as Jensen’s movements slow, as well, opens his eyes and finds Jensen staring down at him.</p>
<p>“Jay... Now.”</p>
<p>Jared blinks, too fucking disoriented by the feeling of Jensen’s hand on him that it takes him a second to realize what he’s saying but then he gets it and he’s pulling his hand free, ears twitching at the wet sound they make as they pull free of the body about to sink down on him.</p>
<p>And it’s that thought that makes Jared stop, makes his eyes go wide, because he’s about to fuck his best friend. “Jen. Wait,” he says and grabs at Jensen’s wrist as he works to line them up for the final moment.</p>
<p>Jensen must hear something in his voice because when he looks up, his eyes are wide, startled.</p>
<p>“Are you sure?” Jared asks and he feels dumb but he has to ask, has to know this is exactly what Jensen wants because if it isn’t, if this ruins them, he’ll never be able to forgive himself.</p>
<p>Jensen’s face softens and he turns his hand, twining his fingers with Jared’s as he leans forward to press a kiss to Jared’s lips. “Three and a half years, I’ve been sure,” he says and Jared’s chest almost hurts at the broken honesty in his friend’s voice.</p>
<p>The tender moment doesn’t last long, though, as Jensen finally sinks down on him and Jared’s brain is overloaded with hot, tight, fuck, Jen and Jensen makes a low groan that seems to travel down the length of his spine and back up Jared’s until it’s echoing in his ears, drowning out everything else around them.</p>
<p>He grips Jensen’s hips on both sides as his head pushes back against the softness of the pillows, eyes closing as the blood pumping so fiercely through his veins drains southward, striving to reach his dick, reach Jensen.</p>
<p>“Fuck… Jen…” he groans out, almost afraid to open his eyes and lose it right there, but even behind his closed lids he can picture the spectacle his best friend makes; body tight and flushed, sweat collecting in the base of his throat, eyes rolled slightly back in his head.</p>
<p>Jensen’s ass is resting on Jared’s thighs, movement too much for either of them for about three seconds before Jensen rocks forward experimentally, forcing a gasp from Jared’s parted lips and his own hips thrust upward as he feels Jensen lick a stripe from the base of his neck to his jaw, dick twitching in the confines of Jensen’s heat.</p>
<p>It’s then he opens his eyes, looks as Jensen settles above him, arms braced on either side of his head, hips slowly working up and forward, body sliding so tightly over his dick it’s almost painful. The green of his eyes is practically nonexistent, lips bitten red and raw and there’s a look on his face that Jared can’t decipher yet understands all the same.</p>
<p>He aches up and takes Jensen’s mouth with his own, one hand raising to cup the back of Jensen’s head as they work up a rhythm, tongues mimicking the movements of their hips and it’s so much, too much and entirely not enough. Jensen lets out soft ah ah ah sounds each time Jared matches him with a thrust, the breathy sound swallowed down by Jared’s mouth, aching, needing to capture every sound, every sensation and commit it to memory.</p>
<p>Jensen twitches and rolls his hips and Jared feels the beginnings of his orgasm working their way from his gut, heat coiling tightly and quickly inside him and he snakes a hand between their sweat covered bodies to fist Jensen’s cock determinedly.</p>
<p>“Come on, Jen. Come for me,” he whispers against that plush mouth and Jensen whimpers at the contact, at the twist, pull, push, twist. His hips stutter only a moment later and Jared can’t help but watch in awe at the look on Jensen’s face as he comes, spilling over them both, over and over, his bottom lip quivering at the intensity. Jared coaxes him through it before fucking into him hard, three times, his own orgasm hitting him like a freight train with its force and it’s all he can do not to literally howl in the darkness of the room.</p>
<p>They’re panting, Jensen’s breath hot against Jared’s throat where he fell and Jared blinks several times, trying to slow his rabid heartbeat. He brings a hand up, fingers trailing through the sweat on Jensen’s back and smiles softly at the shiver it causes his best friend. He thinks he may be dreaming, all of this too surreal, too wanted for too long but when Jensen grunts and pushes up, stares down at him with a speculative look laced with amusement and adoration, he realizes there’s no way this could be a dream, because his dreams, his fantasies, were never this good.</p>
<p>“So… that was intense,” Jensen says, and there’s a hint of a smirk on his lips that makes Jared grin like an idiot.</p>
<p>He nods, hair falling over his eyes but he can’t bring himself to care. “That’s one word for it,” he replies, lets his hand rest on the broad expanse of Jensen’s back.</p>
<p>Jensen smiles, his full-out happy smile and leans down, plants a quick kiss to Jared’s lips. “We should get cleaned up,” he comments and Jared hisses as he pulls away, his spent cock slipping from him and landing against his stomach.</p>
<p>Jensen is climbing from the bed but Jared can’t stand to have him that far away, not yet, not without… “Jen,” he says, hand wrapping around Jensen’s bicep to stop him from moving further. When Jensen looks at him, his eyes are questioning, smile faltering slightly.</p>
<p>“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jared asks and he blinks at Jensen’s quiet huff of laughter.</p>
<p>“Why didn’t you?” he asks and yeah, touché’. It took years of questions and eventually a bottle of tequila and a couple of strangers grinding in a bar to even breach the subject, but looking back on it now, he knew Jensen had to be just as scared as he was.</p>
<p>He doesn’t really know what to say now, though, so he just watches Jensen’s face, memorizes the way his eyes look in the dim light, the glimmer of sweat on his chest from the moonlight and he swallows, realizes there’s a possibility to have everything he always thought about and dismissed as unattainable.</p>
<p>“We’re doin’ this?” he finally whispers, craving the confirmation from Jensen to ensure they’re on the same page and Jensen’s smiling again, that mouth-full-of-teeth smile that crinkles his eyes on the edges.</p>
<p>“We’re doin’ this,” he says with a pat to Jared’s chest. “Now, come on. The food’s already cold, but if we hurry, we might catch the final quarter.”</p>
<p>Watching as Jensen makes his way to his in-suite bathroom, Jared sighs and stares at the ceiling, a disbelieving smile on his face. He just had amazing sex with his best friend and now they’re going to go eat cold Indian food and watch the game.</p>
<p>If he ever sees those two strangers again, he’s going to buy them a fucking house.</p>
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